Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Conspiracy of Denial: Porn



On a recent blog post concerning abortion, someone in the comments mentioned the phrase "Conspiracy of Denial". That phrase has sat with me, and I believe God wants to break open many Conspiracies of Denial. The next one I want to look at is porn. To do that, let me introduce you to Shelley Lubben. In her own words: "Shelley Lubben is a mother, a fighter for truth and survivor against all odds. Shelley is also a former porn actress fighting tirelessly against pornography which affects most of the world in a destructive way."

Before we listen to what Shelly has to say, let's learn a little about who she is. Watch the video below:



Now we will hear about the conspiracy of denial concerning the porn industry. The following comes from this article, which is probably an excerpt from her upcoming book.


Sex-packed porn films featuring freshly-dyed blondes whose evocative eyes say “I want you” is quite possibly one of the greatest deceptions of all time. Trust me, I know. I did it all the time and I did it for the lust of power and the love of money. I never liked sex. I never wanted sex and in fact I was more apt to spend time with Jack Daniels than some of the studs I was paid to “fake it” with. That’s right none of us freshly-dyed blondes like doing porn. In fact, we hate it. We hate being touched by strangers who care nothing about us. We hate being degraded with their foul smells and sweaty bodies. Some women hate it so much you can hear them vomiting in the bathroom between scenes. Others can be found outside smoking an endless chain of Marlboro lights.

But the porn industry wants YOU to think we porn actresses love sex. They want you to think we enjoy being degraded by all kinds of repulsive acts. The truth, porn actresses have showed up on the set not knowing about certain requirements and were told by porn producers to do it or leave without being paid. Work or never work again. Yes, we made the choice. Some of us needed the money. But we were manipulated and coerced and even threatened. Some of us caught HIV from that coercion. I personally caught Herpes, a non-curable sexually transmitted disease. Another porn actress went home after a long night of numbing her pain and put a pistol to her head and pulled the trigger. Now she’s dead.

It’s safe to say most women who turn to porn acting as a money-making enterprise, probably didn’t grow up in healthy childhoods either. Indeed, many actresses admit they’ve experienced sexual abuse, physical abuse, verbal abuse and neglect by parents. Some were raped by relatives and molested by neighbors. When we were little girls we wanted to play with dollies and be mommies, not have big scary men get on top of us. So we were taught at a young age that sex made us valuable. The same horrible violations we experienced then, we relive through as we perform our tricks for you in front of the camera. And we hate every minute of it. We’re traumatized little girls living on anti-depressants, drugs and alcohol acting out our pain in front of YOU who continue to abuse us.

As we continue to traumatize ourselves by making more adult films, we use more and more drugs and alcohol. We live in constant fear of catching AIDS and sexually transmitted diseases. Every time there’s an HIV scare we race to the nearest clinic for an emergency checkup. Pornographers insist giving viewers the fantasy sex they demand all the while sacrificing the very ones who make it happen. In other words, no condoms allowed. Herpes, gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, and other diseases are the normal anxieties we walk around with daily. We get tested monthly but we know testing isn’t prevention. Besides worrying about catching diseases from porn sex, there are other harmful activities we engage in that are also very dangerous. Some of us have had physical tearing and damage to internal body parts.

When porn actresses call it a day and head home we attempt to have normal healthy relationships but some of our boyfriends get jealous and physically abuse us. So instead we marry our porn directors while others of us prefer lesbian relationships. It’s a real memory making moment when our daughter accidentally walks out and sees mommy kissing another girl. My daughter will vouch for that one.

On our days off we walk around like zombies with a beer in one hand and a
shot of whiskey in the other. We aren’t up to cleaning so we live in filth most of the time or we hire a sweet foreign lady to come in and clean up our mess. Porn Actresses aren’t the best cooks either. Ordering food in is normal for us and most of the time we throw up after we eat because we’re bulimic.

For porn actresses who have children, we are the world’s WORST mothers. We
yell and scream and hit our kids for no reason. Most of the time we are intoxicated or high and our four year olds are the ones picking us up off the floor. When clients come over for sex, we lock our children in their rooms and tell them to be quiet. I use to give my daughter a beeper and tell her to wait at the park until I was finished.

The truth is there IS NO fantasy in porn. It’s all a lie. A closer look into the scenes of a porn star’s life will show you a movie porn doesn’t want you to see. The real truth is we porn actresses want to end the shame and trauma of our lives but we can’t do it alone. We need you men to fight for our freedom and give us back our honor. We need you to hold us in your strong arms while we sob tears over our deep wounds and begin to heal. We want you throw out our movies and help piece together the shattered fragments of our lives. We need you to pray for us the next fifteen years so God will hear and repair our ruined lives.

So don’t believe the lie anymore. Porn is nothing more than fake sex and lies on videotape. Trust me, I know.

Unfortunately the church hasn't always been the best witness of Jesus to those involved in porn, erotic dancing, and prostitution. But there is Light at the end of the tunnel: check out the JC girls, below:

7 comments:

BrunetteKoala said...

Wow.

This is something that has been on my heart for a long time, and will probably be blogging on this later.

Heather's ministry is one that is really inspiring as I've been asking God what it is he has been wanting me to do, as many of my friends have been encouraging me to go into some kind of sex and relationships education/pastoring type ministry.

This is a huge challenge.

What these women have gone through and the emotional, physical and spiritual healing that was needed and which only God could do.

To go through such abuse from men and be used as an object of fantasy - it is a struggle to then look upon God as a trustworthy father.

Pornography, abortion, sexual abuse, addiction to sex are all things that a few things in commmon - stigma, harmful consequences, but most of all secrecy.

And as you say - the conspiracy of denial...these things are becoming more and more 'right' in the eyes of the world....

Alastair said...

Thanks, brunettekoala. The more I grow in Jesus, the more I am confident in him to rescue and heal people from this sort of thing. I do hope in the Lord that you consider this important area of ministry. For years now I keep saying "why are we not talking about the prostitutes in Edinburgh?". Its time to bring all this stuff into the Light, not to condemn, but to bring God's love and healing to all.

I am increasingly disturbed by how acceptable porn is in the world, as you point out. It is no longer shameful to admit watching women being practically raped. God help us all.

Thanks for your thoughts. To your list of consequences of sexual sin, I would also add shame. Thank God that Jesus died not only for our sins, but to take away the stain of sin, to take away all guilt and shame. What a wonderful truth -- now we need to share that with the world.

Paul said...

i guess that male porn stars feel similar feelings to some extent?

You are right alastair that porn is basically selling a feel good fantasy that both men and women buy into - sex with no complications or hang ups that fills our desire for intimact without overcoming our inability to exchange getting for giving.

BrunetteKoala said...

Yep. So true Alastair. The common words I hear to describe how women feel when it comes to these issues

guilt
shame
anger
hurt

Over and over again...

pornstudent said...

"'There's a man in the apartment complex who thinks you're real pretty and he wants to make love to you and you can make $35.' Ah! I was horrified... I had never prostituted myself."

"And so I ended up being lured into the sex industry."

She wasn't lured. She knowingly and willingly became a prostitute.

"Prostitution lost its allure.... And someone says, 'Why don't you do porn?' And I said, 'I never even thought about that. Who do you talk to?'"

She knowingly and willingly became a porn actress.

The guilt and shame is caused by religion, not the industry.

mkummer said...

Religion doesn't cause guilt and shame pornstudent and you know that. If you do something that hurts yourself or others you naturally feel these emotions. It's human wiring which can be attributed to nothing other than some higher power that progrmmed us in such a way. Conscience has no place in the animal kingdom but is unavoidable in humans (no matter how numbed or suppresive people can become over time)so evolutionary causation is out. Religion as we know it may be stupid, but there is some being bigger than us. I don't consider myself a true Christian at this point but I certainly would like to think it's a God who loves us as saccharine as it sounds.

Anonymous said...

Way saddening how many men will excuse what, as one poster obve pointed out, is the paid rape, usually of incest survivors.

What kind of world do we live in? One that we are responsible for.